 I really enjoyed Dan Ariely's last two books, so I decided to read his latest which just recently came out, Irrationally Yours: On Missing Socks, Pickup Lines, and Other Existential Puzzles. This one was a very short, fun read made up of Dan's answers to reader questions in his weekly Wall Street Journal column. It was a good mix of behavioral economics/psychology combined with a nice dose of his Jewish sense of humor. I most enjoyed his discussions of memory and deception as well as his suggestions to use more rules to curtail temptations and keep you disciplined.
Intro Studying social behavior Escalation of commitments Art and joy of saying no When get request assume it is for next week. Would u cancel for it? If have to cancel another activity for it, would u? Cancel elation: would u feel happy if it got canceled? Netflix dissatisfaction Loss aversion Think of it as museum Dieting Present focus bias Hard to separate self into eater and noneater Avoid exposing self to bad foods Replace foods at home Religious rules to dieting Forgotten and forgiven loans Loaner to bring it up and clarify Marriage economics Social networks and norms Coffee People paying for the story Wedding ring Give gift u don't enjoy shopping for as signal Whistle blowing Variety as memory enhancement Break up week into series of separate experiences Benefits of crowded places for dates Misattribution of emotions Hiring good and free advisor What advice would give best friend in that situation Garlic placebos Specific requests More likely to help when request is specific Grandparents Saying sorry always helps Thinking ahead People think usually only 1 step ahead in game Gossip as social coordination mechanism To participate more fully in conversations Marriage changes ur view of ur own relationship and long term thinking Ruminating while running Joy of getting things done Hard to find joy when can't fully complete a big project at once Potential to make something new perfect increases motivation Pick projects that are self contained Multitasking Calling home Toasts and superstition Low cost to ritual vs big cost to not following Pickup lines Compliments make people happier Illusion of labor Think time is wasted when don't see progress Take joy from seeing someone work hard for us even if it takes longer Make clear to others how hard u work Misery of flying Think of marvel of flight Evidence of common humanity Flashy cars Signaling Dressing down Wearing clothes from different culture prevents PPl thinking ur too casual Exploring the unknown Loss aversion makes us not try something new Trying out relationships Carry out experiments in similar situation Spend 2 weeks with girlfriend's mother Divorce rate 2 good experiences: pleasures and comforts Give up comforts and seek pleasure Financial advisor Imagine paying them monthly from ur checking account Sharing food with squirrels Internet social activity Expectations and hiring Dating: knowing more about someone leads to less love CEOs hired from outside get paid more because don't know as much about them Learning better decisions Create good habits Delegate difficult decisions to rules and habits Power of expectations Don't over heighten expectations Don't exaggerate by too much; 10% ok Communicating safety Call mother at night Perfect gift Increase likelihood gift is used Swap in gift for old ones so it's used Eating lessons and kids Maximizer should eat better food first Avoiding minimum type should first eat worse food then better one after Useful complaining Think of reason someone is complaining and make most of it Prices and bidding frenzy Auctions: starting perspective vs competition Initial asking price affects expectations Stress and caring for old Luck as multiple stage number game Luckier people try things more often In life decisions are not binary and involve multiple stages Life is a numbers game Cut options that aren't working Socks and supernatural Overcounting of missing socks Involves how our memory works Tithing Giving money away leads to happiness Have specific rules Midlife cliche Websites creating alibis Increase dishonesty Breakfast regrets Counterfactuals Comparing what could've been in imagined world When don't imagine world then feel better Night time activities Problem of coordination Suboptimal default option Sequential coordination instead Draw random activity per night Playing parents Move in for week with friends who have kids Take care of kids of different age groups Joint accounts Wine ordering Set limit on spending Traffic jam altruism Issues of control and credit/gratitude Idle waiting Annoying irrationally to ppl Forcing decisions with coins Opportunity cost of time Spinning coin forces us to decide which one we really want Trashing norms Changing social norms Relentlessly critique violators Create new social norm Smoking Effects cumulative and delayed Adventures and investments Life is about learning and improving where can become a different and better person Retirement Correcting mistakes Honesty on vacation Paying food bill Better for one person to pay and alternate to increase good feelings of free meal Exercise time Procrastination Memory Fewer new experiences as age More routine Audiobooks Pascal wager Showing off price Accumulating pleasure and pain How to combine experiences Extreme vs average approach Pay attention to joyful part of each experience Lack of self control Depletion after full day Ability to resist urges depletes like muscle Odysseus with sirens tied to mast with strict rule Keep tempting food out of house Balancing and rule of three Sweet spot Wasting time deciding Limit time spent deciding group activity Set up default activity if can't decide Buffet ROI Asking right questions Ask the stupid questions Donuts and locus of free will We can design our environment to help overcome our weaknesses Most optimistic day New year resolutions wishful thinking Investing Hot cold empathy gap Set up rules that prevent emotional decisions Don't look at portfolio often Limit our ability to make decisions Commuting and adaptation Uncertainty makes adapting to traffic difficult Travel prices Different emotional states when making decision vs having experience Promotions Joy from developing in career Invention of titles Gamification for employees Identifiable victim effect Care more when see the victim vs when have psychological distance Other job switching Volunteer at other company for a while to see if like it during vacation Moving or not Endowment effect of current situation as reference point Status quo bias: staying in same place is actually a decision Frame move as 6 month trial Bad academics Hard to communicate Curse of knowledge Bad romance Fun and self control Shrinking and self deception High heel attractiveness Rules to overcome negative signals Taxes and mitzvahs Think of how much u made instead How much giving to others Duty and privilege Reframing Service word Loss aversion and sports Bad at predicting emotional response to losses Enjoying process more important than final outcome
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